more random stuff

some random stuff I wrote a couple months ago....

AUTUMN

it seems as if im going to start to dread the fall. But how can I dread a season that I love so much? death...abandonment... well, i guess, fall is the season of death.

I wonder what that says about me - or the people who choose autumn as one of their favorite seasons? I mean, autumn represents not death itself, as does winter, but rather, the most grueling part of the life cycle... the point right before death... the deteriation. We watch plants die and rebirth themselves each year. So, in theory are humans just another fruit of the earth, like the plants... here only for a certain amount of time, only to be recycled.. I guess that's what the birth process is all about.


------- later the same night,.. 2/20/09--------------

i love that we are constantly reminded about how very different and unique each and everyone of us.




------------------------------ the next day --------------

i dont know what to write...
I just know that I feel, I feel so much.......
everything.... everyday.


----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I sat and listened....

We Are......

FAMILY! - Thanks Diana and the Supremes! :)


Okay – so, I’m supposed to be writing about family in this post… I’m not really feeling that poetic these days so, it’s just a splatter of my random thoughts on the subject, separated, somewhat, by paragraphs… here goes:

Now, I know that I’m a sucker for love and that I love anything that has to do with love. I believe that almost anything can be made possible with love. But, I can say that although Love may be one of the most important things – Family is neck and neck with it….. I mean, when you think about it – we learn to love from our families. Our families – whom ever they may be (I’ll touch on that later) are the first ones to show us how to love, how to treat others, and basically how to live.

I don’t think anyone would argue that family is important – but I think that people fail to realize the magnitude or the extreme importance of family. I have always known how significant family is, but until working in my position now, I can’t say that I understood the true meaning of the term.
At work I go see an average of 4 families a day – in their homes, in their private lives. It’s amazing. I’m lucky enough to enter 4 different worlds each day – 4 different lives of these mothers, 4 different stories. And while one family may be well to do, and the next families lights are getting shut off, and another family is just so obnoxious that I can’t stand them – they all have one thing in common – their family comes first above everything else. Aside from their living conditions and the everyday stressors of life, they all strive to make their family the best family that it can be.
Now, I’m going to get a little technical – just a little. So, technically – in order for a family to be a family – there has to be children – I mean – two people are just a couple, you’re not a family until you two have a little one. That should stress the importance of the word right there – I mean, how important is it to be shaping someone’s life – to be the “go to” man (or woman) in this persons life –to be what your mother, or father, or caregiver was to you – gosh, it just means so much. How can that NOT be important to someone? How can that NOT be something that you try your hardest at? This is why family is so powerful – It starts from nothing, and it grows. Family grows together – from the beginning into forever. It’s a guaranteed forever…It’s destiny – some may argue. Families help mold each other and shape each other and create bonds from so young that you can’t strip those connections away – they are embedded in you like the markings you might find on a grain of rice. – no way to break free – family is in our blood.

Families provide that safe place – they provide structure in a world that is otherwise viewed as chaotic. If you think about it – family is almost essential to survival. Even those who don’t have or can’t identify with a ‘biological’ family create families early on with individuals with whom they are close to… I mean, gangs were created with the whole notion of family – people crave closeness, we desire to feel loved – and who will love you if your family hasn’t taught you to love – showed you how to love?
Sometimes families are all that people have left, many times families are the reason that many people keep pushing, keep living, keep learning – In my profession – sometimes family is the one thing that determines success or failure – life or death.

No matter who is in your family or what type of family it is – you are above all else – Family. You are bonded in a way that no other person or group of people can bond with you – These bonds are full of frustration, and anger sometimes yes – but, more importantly, they are full of shared experiences, shared emotions, shared dreams.

Obama and Michelle have started doing a great job of bringing the dream of “family” back into the individualistic American society – I only hope that the image, the hope, and the love of family touches everyone enough to keep family number 1.

But, what's your motivation?

I heard a women ask another women at work today "do you 'journal'" -and the other women said, not since she was a teenager- she just didn't have time anymore... the first lady said to her - you can always find time to journal - and then the other women says - "I need motivation- i don't have motivation" and me, being the nosy person that I am blurted out "LIFE!!! life is the greatest motivation of all!" - and I meant it. And while she'll go home tonight with her kids and her husband and think about all the things that have happened in her day, and her life - she will still be searching for her motivation...

Sometimes I think people look too hard to find motivation... it's like your mind is like those "Where's Waldo" books... it's all cluttered and full of great and different exciting things... but you're looking for that one thing; person, situation, event - and so you pass up all those other very interesting events or people still looking for that one... and yeah, sometimes you find him... and you're really excited, and it's really good - but sometimes, you don't, and you have to keep turning the pages and try again later ...
When that happens, just think of all the great things you overlooked just to be empty handed in the end.
I say go with anything that catches your eye - or motivation for that matter - even if it's just a little - we are only on this earth for so long - why waste most of it looking for something that is right in front of our faces? If you can feel feelings- you have motivation... and those two things are all you need.

I can't lie, I'm one of the main culprits of complaining about no motivation - but I'm learning :) - Maybe my new found motivational freedom will get me to write more... even if it's just random stuff like this... :)

Goodness, I love words. They are really a gift that should be cherished... Words, like most art, create concrete memories... and memories, well - they are priceless. I think memories are one of the most important parts of life - one of my favorites. :) Wish I could write as many words as I have memories.... :)

Perspective

it's so funny how your perspective of things change at different points in your life - and not just the age thing...but like how you think about a certain quote today can be completely different tomorrow if you had different experiences. I was just looking at some of my drafts and reading how I started the blog and I just couldn't finish it - I just didn't feel the same way I did when I was "inspired" by the quote the first time. But the funny thing is - I'm still inspired by the quote, but in a completely different way! Just imagine all the 'alterations' our mind has made about certain situations larger than a quote.... any who.. just thought that was interesting... not like this blog entry - sorry.